10 Things To Remember When Choosing an Auspicious Wedding Date and 2020’s Best Dates

One of the important Chinese traditions that couple’s need to heed when planning their wedding is picking an auspicious wedding date. To the Chinese, having the right wedding date is key as it plays a great role in the kind of marriage you have. Choosing the wrong date is believed to cause marriage problems, and even failed marriages. Many couples seek out help from a Chinese wedding master. But whether you do or do not, here are 10 very important things to remember when selecting an auspicious wedding date.

[From: An Elegant Wedding at Discovery Bay / Photo: Martin Aesthetics]

 

(1) Ladies Go First

While it’s known that males are the highly esteemed gender in Chinese tradition, when it comes to weddings and choosing a wedding date, ladies are considered first. In general, the bride’s birth date is looked into first and considered first, followed by that of the groom and the rest of the family. A the famous Chinese proverb (子靠出生時.女靠行嫁年) says, “If a man can have a better life is depends on the date he born, while if a woman can have a better life is depends on the date she married.” Therefore, the importance of choosing an auspicious date for a wedding hinges a lot on how it relates to the woman.

 

[From: This Fun-Loving Couple Added a Bohemian Twist to Their Wedding / Photo: Martin Aesthetics]

 

(2) Choose Good Dates For Both Of You

[From: This Bride Had 5 Outfits During Her Hong Kong Wedding! / Photo: My Memory Wedding Production]

Of course, it’s best to choose good dates for the both of you, for instance days with “Tian Yi Gui Ren”. (天乙貴人) Gui Ren is a Chinese god, like a life changer, meaning this will be a good, life-changing date for the both of you.

 

[From: Sweet Pastel Wedding at W Hotel / Photo: MC Photography]

 

(3) Avoid Dates Related to “Ghosts”

Any date related to funerals–perhaps a past death of a family member–is bad luck. Wedding dates should not fall on the same date or within 3 months. Similarly, any date that is related to “ghosts” like “ghost months”, should be avoided. Ghost months to be avoided are March, July and September on lunar calendar because the Ching Ming Festival, Hungry Ghost Festival, and Chung Yeung Festival, which are all “ghost” festivals, take place on these months.

 

(4) Stay Away From Traditional Taboo Dates

There are also traditional taboo dates that you should definitely stay away from. These are the 3rd, 13th, 18th, 22nd and 27th lunar days in every month. They’re also known as the bad days of “San Niang Sha.” According the Chinese legend, the God of Marriage refused to pull the silken cord for Sanniang, so she could not get married. In a revenge, she often opposed the God of Marriage and ruined the wedding of new couples on the 3rd, 7th, 13rd, 18th, 22nd, and 27th lunar days in every month. Therefore, these dates are not advised to be wedding dates.

 

[From: This Bride Had 5 Outfits During Her Hong Kong Wedding! / Photo: My Memory Wedding Production]

 

 

(5) Avoid The Birthdays of The Bride, The Groom, and The Couple’s Parents

[From: This Fun-Loving Couple Added a Bohemian Twist to Their Wedding / Photo: Martin Aesthetics]

Other dates that should remain untouched are the birthdays or the bride, groom, and parents. While some might want to have double celebrations for double happiness, the traditional Chinese belief is that this is not ideal so it’s better to avoid these dates. You should also avoid birthdays of brothers and sisters, too.

 

[From: An Elegant Wedding at Discovery Bay / Photo: Martin Aesthetics]

 

(6) If You Have Two or More Celebrations, The Banquet Date is The Authentic Wedding Date

If you are thinking of having your wedding ceremony and wedding banquet on the same date, then you only have to select one auspicious date. But if you will be having the ceremony and banquet on different wedding dates, you should choose 2 auspicious dates for both. If this is not possible–for one reason or another–then the date of the traditional banquet should at fall on an auspicious day because this is considered the authentic wedding date or the official wedding date based on Chinese tradition.

 

(7) Do Not Choose Dates In Conflict With The Chinese Zodiac Sign

According to the Chinese Zodiac, certain signs conflict with each other, for example, Rat and Horse, Ox and Sheep, Tiger and Monkey, Rabbit and Rooster, Dragon and Dog, Snake and Pig are animal signs in conflict with each other. For your wedding date, avoid the conflicting sign’s date. So if you are under the Rat sign, you should avoid the Horse day. You can check the Chinese Almanac for details.

 

[From: This Bride Had 5 Outfits During Her Hong Kong Wedding / Photo: My Memory Wedding Production]

 

(8) Look for Chinese Almanac of the Year

The Chinese Almanac of the Year would usually be published by around September of the year before. Therefore, the 2020 Chinese Almanac should be published at September 2019. You can go to bookstores or newspaper stalls to buy one. It has much more details than the Chinese calendar.

 

(9) Go for a Feng Shui Master or Check the Date Online

There are so many information online. And you can even find suggested auspicious dates before Chinese Almanac of the Year is out. Are they trustworthy? Or, your parents want you to go for a Feng Shui Master to choose the date? No matter which way you choose, please make sure you get the agreement from your fiancee and both parents. If you would go for a Feng Shui Master, please prepare the information before the appointment.

[From: Sweet Pastel Wedding at W Hotel / Photo: MC Photography]

 

(10) Check The Calendar Year’s Auspicious Dates

Finally, make sure you check the calendar year’s declared auspicious dates. This is usually available at the beginning of the year. For 2020, these are the relevant dates.

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