Hi, loves! Today we’re reaching out to all the ladies (and men) out there who are struggling with long-distance relationships. Yes, we know it’s tough and it can get really, really, difficult. That’s why we’re here to help you out. We talked to a few girls who have endured long-distance relationships and asked them to share with us some tips that proved to be essential in the success of their relationships.
Keep connected everyday. You and your partner will have zero knowledge of what the other is doing and feeling unless you communicate with each other. Learn to elaborate on your daily activities so your partner is in tune of how you are and how your day went. You need not engage in video calls everyday, even a few minutes to message or chat is enough to keep you both up-to-date.
Be vocal when it comes to feelings. Sometimes we expect our partner to be sensitive enough to know if something hurt us or if a simple gesture made us happy. But the truth is, we can miss these little details, more so when in a long-distance relationship. Make it a practice to express your feelings to one another, good or bad, so that you’re both aware of how each one is feeling and you can address those feelings appropriately and immediately. This way, problems or issues also don’t get buried in time to be resurfaced later as a full-blown fight.
(2) Keep the spark alive.
This is where you have to be creative! Just because you’re not physically together, it doesn’t mean you can’t do things to relive the excitement and thrill of being together. You can still go on virtual dates and you can still do activities together online over Skype or Facetime! Thanks to modern technology, the possibilities are quite extensive. These digital moments make you feel less like you’re miles and miles apart.
Send each other gifts, letters or postcards, and other random packages. This may sound a little old-school but these gestures make a huge difference. The effort behind these simple acts let the other person feel appreciated and the thought that goes with each gesture is truly heartwarming.
(3) Have a common, long-term goal.
Long-distance relationships are tough and can take a toll on either one of its participants. Having an end goal in mind gives direction to the relationship and makes it more feasible and inspiring because there’s something to look forward to. Share your dreams with one another and set a long-term plan that works for both of you and brings you two together. Then, work towards this goal together. Make realistic, practical, and specific steps that will help you achieve this goal. The last thing any person wants is to be in a relationship and not know where it’s going. The same goes for long-distance relationships.
(4) Enjoy your own life.
Don’t be afraid to really live your life and focus on yourself! Allow yourself to grow, too, as an individual. Go out, meet new people, and try new things. Of course, keep your partner updated and share the many new things you do and learn with him or her. Passing the time is a lot easier when you’re busy or having fun. It makes the day in and day out spent apart less of a burden and more like time to prepare yourself for the end goal in mind.
(5) Trust one another.
This is related to the previous point made on living your life. In the same manner, you must allow your partner to do the same, live his or her life. It sounds easy, but the central foundation that allows you to both live your lives and grow as individuals while being far, far apart, is TRUST. Without trust, you can easily get controlling and possessive. Let trust guide you both. Trust that in the time spent living and enjoying life away, you are both making conscious choices and taking real actions towards your end goal.
(6) Empathize with your partner.
You’re both having a hard time. A little understanding goes a long way. The road to the end goal will always present challenges and empathizing with your partner will help him or her gain confidence in your purpose. Uplifting and supporting each other with positive and encouraging words will always help the other get through a rough day.
(7) Enjoy the moments you miss each other as much as the moments you spend together!
They say the best thing about being in a long-distance relationship is that you cherish every moment together even more because it’s short and limited. But this shouldn’t mean that you take the time spent apart for granted. Hold on to the longing feeling, too. It adds to the magic and thrill that awaits the next time you see each other.
The struggles and challenges that come with distance will really threaten you relationship. But if you’re both determined, and you let your love lead you, you will win.
Special thanks to Grace Ann Gamboa-Puentevella, Rica Jose-Adsbol, and Judith Hilomen for giving insight for this article. Grace and Rica are now married after two years and four and a half years of being in long-distance relationships respectively. Judith has been in a long-distance relationship for four and a half years and is to be wed this coming April 2017.